Wordcount
July 25th, 2004Wordcount (via Ben Hammersley) is a nice Flash application that ranks the 86,000 most-used words in the English language, sizing each one according to its frequency, and allows you to explore them in a linear fashion. But the interface is infuriating in some respects - buttons too small, and navigating along the line is horribly slow - why isn’t there a » button to speed along 10 places at once?
Still it does come up with some nice sequences, like: “Scandinavia shocks Dougal” (#14074-14076), “Palestinian Owl advertisement” (#6460-6462), “Despotism clinching Internet” (#30523-30525) and “Charming fuck workshops” (#5597-5599). I could have invented a new Internet sport here…
July 26th, 2004 at 00:47:44
Parenting Intensify Nudged Cunt
(18633-18636)
July 26th, 2004 at 01:47:07
“Sex claimed organisation holding budget families” (#1236-1241) is a tabloid headline for the future.
Tom and I have discovered its true worth though, which is making up obscure bandnames, like “Neon Porn Convict”(#17244-6), “Micronesia Renegades” (#52972-3) and my own favourite - “Indies Bitch Teenagers” (#7425-8).
July 26th, 2004 at 03:02:37
Or “Intubation Poof Fellatio”, who I believe I saw at On The Rocks a few months ago. Supported by “Havana Materialist Vista” and “Angel Seeks Supper”.
But #3046 to 3051 is my favourite sequence, being an accurate summation of George Bush’s election strategy: “Iraq winner, fucking smooth, nick votes”. Closely followed by “Homosexual loses papal schooling”, in at numbers 7964 - 7967.
July 26th, 2004 at 03:11:10
“Incredibly Terrorist Winchester.”
July 26th, 2004 at 03:24:12
And, on the double bombshell of “ageing breasts contempt” (6038-6040) and “isomorphous jizz overend” (82389-82391), I think I might, er, stop.
July 26th, 2004 at 08:03:53
…and to think I just looked up where Azerbaijan sat in the rankings (#13471) then decided my time would be better spent doing… well, anything…!
Wasn’t I proved wrong…
July 26th, 2004 at 18:30:12
Agents smell denied Lewis (2632-2635)
July 26th, 2004 at 22:20:57
It seems that “cocksmith” is not currently in the archive. I think we should petition to have it added.
July 27th, 2004 at 00:10:58
“Tart stuffing observable adverages fidelity” (14725-14729) Sven’s credo?
July 27th, 2004 at 00:35:37
from MoFi, 4304-4307: “Microsoft aquire salary tremendous”.
July 27th, 2004 at 09:44:02
“Apple gate geek monkey” :)
July 27th, 2004 at 10:14:42
You git. You made me check that in the vain hope it was true.
However though my surname doesn’t feature, yours certainly does: #41719-41721 is “Grasshopper popularized Baldock”
July 27th, 2004 at 14:15:59
Your forename features however. Words 2251-2253 advise us to “pull chris somehow”. Word 2254 goes on to explain how: “payments”
July 27th, 2004 at 15:21:39
Payments to whom? I know I haven’t received anything lately…
July 27th, 2004 at 15:34:08
*gives sinister chuckle, looks round furtively, removes bundle of twenties from brown envelope, pockets them*